This picture is of my maternal grandmother. Wasn’t she a hottie?
She worked at Radio City Music Hall as a Rockette in the 1940s — drawn to New York City, like so many youth, by the lights and glamour. Her stage name was Bobbie Robinson, though her real name was Mary.
This blog post isn’t about her life, but about the passage of time.
I’ve always understood that youth and beauty are fleeting. Perhaps it is because my parents died when I was still young. The fact hits home even more so when comparing photos of my grandmother as a young dancer to those taken of her just before her death in her 80s, balding after years of using peroxide hair dye.
Thus, I’ve tried not to stake any self confidence on the things over which I have no control. Age is one of those things.
Yet, I’m not as above mourning the loss of youth as I’d thought.
Yesterday, I e-mailed an inner-circle friend and lamented that 2010 had passed without us seeing each other. (Having close friends scattered to the winds seems to be a common phenomenon for my generation.)
My friend wrote back, “I was thinking, are you doing anything fun for your 30th birthday?”
Her casual question took my breath away: This is the year that I turn 30!
This year, 2011, is also a milestone for an entire generation: the first of the Baby Boomers turn 65. As such, my New Year’s resolution doesn’t apply only to me:
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.from the Desiderata poem
Every year is a blessing. I’ve had a blast in my 20s — I set upon them with the motto that they would be mostly about my own personal growth, about chasing adventures, about discovering the world. I always joked, “I’ll give back to society in my 30s.” (I never really even thought about my 40s, they seemed so far away.)
Well, here we are then. It’s okay to briefly mourn what is lost, but we must also keep an eye on what we’ve gained.
I have much to look forward to. Apparently, happiness increases after age 46 and continues to climb after that. From the most recent Economist:
Older people have fewer rows and come up with better solutions to conflict. They are better at controlling their emotions, better at accepting misfortune and less prone to anger.
May we all face the future with optimism and grace.
Happy 2011, friends.
Very nice. I can attest that things do get nice around age 46 – but I think one calms down by that age. You learn to surround yourself with only good people, let go of the ones who bring darkness to your soul. You also realize that some people will dislike you for something as simple as the way you breathe. And, somehow, it doesn’t bother you like it did when you were younger. With peace within you your beauty becomes more refined, and internal glow – rather than the external glow that comes naturally with youth.
Wow, can you believe we’re about to TURN 30?! HOLY COW.
So glad I got to pass my 20s with you — if not always physically, through e-mail and in spirit 🙂
Cheers to an awesome 2011!
Happy 30th! in advance (it’s remarkable how much you’ve already accomplished & experienced) & best wishes for a happy & healthy New Year. The earlier post you linked to, “A Love Message,” is exceptionally touching.
Happy new year!
Hope this new year is a great onr for you and Derek and Family!
Stunning picture. And, yes, you are getting ancient. But, as you pointed out, things do get better with time. I can say that my 40’s–early portion–have been the best years of my life. I do not even think about any of that junk I used to like material stuff and getting ahead. It all can evaporate, for different reasons, in an instant. What matters if enjoying every day to its fullest. In fact, I think at my age right now I perfectly positioned–at the absolute apex in so many ways. Yaaaaa!!!!
By the way, have you seen Art Thiel and some of the other old PI people’s new publication/website. It is high quality stuff. http://sportspressnw.com/. You do high quality stuff of a different nature–life commentary-type writing–that also would be appropriate for an even wider audience. In fact, Thiel’s site is going to start charging and I am going to pony up for it. It already is the best sports page in town. The Times always has sucked in that area. Anyway, I digress.
One of the reasons why teenagers find their lives so stressful is that they can’t see beyond themselves. When your world is so small even the slightest embarrassment, like tripping in front of your peers, is huge. That comment is not intended to disparage teenagers, it just is the way they are wired, ask any school counselor.
As you grow older you start to appreciate that there is world beyond yourself and slowly your problems become less mentally overwhelming than they perhaps once were. This “counseling of the years” is indeed one of the compensations of growing older.
Stunning picture.
I always joked — but only semi joked — in my 20s that if I wasn’t a reporter, I’d want to be a Rockette.
I know Alexis heard this a bunch on her blog, but I’ll say it here, too: No matter how wild and wonderful your 20s were, 30s are almost always better. You get a deeper level of comfort with yourself and your life.
Wishing you an awesome 2011!
Your words are touching, Andrea!
This is beautiful. The time goes by fast.
I am learning…I am older than you…but I got to this site because I typed in the question “How does one gracefully surrender the things of youth”?. I had to laugh at myself because the whole prose tells you how. Thank you.